Friday, June 25, 2010

Butterfly Effect

Picture by Dr Freezo


"Butterfly Effect"
by May S. Sittikraisorn

She was a cute little girl,

Chasing around one butterfly she found,

How fascinating she thought.

Asked her mama if she could keep

Mama said, Dear little girl

Butterflies are not meant to be caught

Let them fly, fly high to the blue sky

The butterfly overheard and said,

Dear Lil Girl, Life is short,

Don't waste you times trying to catch me,

'Cos I will fly, fly away from you,

The lil girl smiled and said, “But I like you”

Little times with you is all I'm asking for,

Know I might cry the sooner you fly away

So can I have a little more times with you?

Just a little more times...

Life goes on

Picture by Emre Ucar

"Life goes on"

by May S. Sittikraisorn


The answer is right in front of me.

How could I have not seen?

Felt like a fool, once was a master,

Lesson learned, yet forgot as times went by,

A question WHY repeated numerously,

Nowhere to run and hide,

Drown in the sea of running tears,

Again and again,

The sun was shining,

Found no light but a cold wind.

As days went by,

Visits from my own nightmares,

Heard the voice saying

It’s time to stop,

Memories meant to remember,

Sweet or Bitter,

Like it or not,

Yes life goes on, and so should you.

Look around and tell me what you see?

The answer is laying in you,

Laying in you...


Friday, June 4, 2010

My love/hate relationship with my "Period"


"A period is like your family. You love to see them sometimes until they start to annoy you and be such a pain in the arse. When they're going away for too long, you wish they would come back soon or else you'd start to get so worried why they're not back yet"


- May S. Sittikraisorn


And thats exactly how I've alwats felt about my period =P

I still remember the first time I "met" my period. I think I was 11 which was quite early for a girl to have her period. I'm pretty sure I screamed the hell out of me not knowing what happened to me. My first thought was, "Why is there blood on my pants? Is something wrong with me?" My mom calmed me down of course. She had to explain that I was about to be a teenager and how I should react to it. It was a weird feeling that my body was going through some changes. It reminded me of the time when I started to grow my boob. I don't think men would understand or know about this, but a woman breast would grow on one side first; hence it's a bit bigger than the other =P

The only thing I hate about having a period is menstrual pain; the worst physical pain a lot of women have to go through all their life. Mine is getting worst as I grow older. I remember taking a lot of pain killers during my university years. I always had to go university ward like every times my period came to visit me. One day, during my last year in the university, one of my friends suggested that I might want to try to take birth control pills to stop the pain. I wondered how it would really work but it actually did. My period came right on times, no more pain, plus my facial skin got even better =) It's just funny when people started asking me why I looked better and that I had to tell them, "Oh I took the pills, you should try it too". Their next question would be "But why would you take the pills when you don't even have a bf or have sex with anyone?" I laughed. Well yeah, I was a virgin but there's nothing wrong about taking the pills even though you don't have sex.

Birth control pills to me have been a wonderful miracle all these years. Yet, there was a side effect as well since each brand has got differet amount of the hormones estrogen and progesterone. In the beginning, my stomachache was gone but it was replaced with a huge headache in the back of my head. I had to consult with a pharmacist so I could finally find the least strong pills for me. No more headache for me yay! It made me realize that each pills really work differently on different persons. I once suggested this birth control pill I was using to my best friend. It worked fine for me but to her, she always felt so sick and threw up so she had to change to use another brand.

Keeping track on taking a pill should be easy for most people. I am, for one, a very forgetful person. It occured to me so many times that I forgot to take a pill and that I had to take 2 of them on the next day, which was not very good for my health. After a while I kinda have to stop taking pills and learn to handle my pain. It grew stronger every times I felt it. The worst pain in my life so far occured one morning when I was on a company minivan on our way to the office. I was literally hurt so much I actually fainted and passed out. The next thing I knew I was hospitalized as my blood pressure was very low (around 50). I ended up staying in the hospital for a night. My blood pressure came back at 75 again. I just hope I would not have to go thru this again.

So what I've done for past few years now, though I sometimes still forgot, is writing down where I start having my period from the first day to the last day. This really helped me find out that my period is actually always on time, and even more punctual than me! lol So when I noticed that my period is about to come visit me and it had not, I would start to get so worried why it had not. It's not like I'm a careless person when it comes to sex; I am very careful about it, but I've also learned that condoms only works 98% of the times. There's 2% chances that you might get pregnant even though you use the condoms! See, this is a funny thing about period; the more you get freaked out or start to get worried, it really likes to play "hide and seek" with you! Frankly, I am not really a fan. I'm sure that most women would feel the same, esp when you're being more stressful about it, you could secretly feel that you're going to have more wrinkles after the game is finished grrrrr

I'd really like to thanks Cosmopolitan magazine and internet for providing me enough sex knowledges I've ever needed in life, things I would never learn at school. One thing you should know is that being educated in Thailand, you have no idea about sex education; it's like a forbidden crime or something. I remember my school did not exactly teach how to wear a condom but give away free condoms. I had never even heard of birth control pills till I was in the university. Seriously, something really needs to be changed here. There's really nothing wrong for young teenagers to learn about sex. I know that Thai people think sex is not a subject to be discussed or taught in public but I'd have to disagree cos I personally think that even though the kids are forbidden to learn about it in school, they will find it somewhere else anyway. So why don't we teach them where we can keep them in our eyes, you know what I mean?

Enough with me blah blah blah about my period experience. I know I could go on and on complaining about it really hehe Just imagine if I accidentally got pregnant today, I'd probably be gonna miss my period though. We've been going through a lot of hard times together. At least I still survive and we still have walk together for another 20 years for me at least (or less hahaha) I also like to think of those wonderful feeling I could feel if I ever got pregnant, you know, feeling like a mummy and understand what my mum has been through. I think I'd love her even more than I do now! When that day comes, I think I'd probably write about my complaint on being a pregnant woman lol

Thanks for reading xoxo





Disclaimer: I don't own these images. They were randomly found through Google search. If you own these images and would like these images to be removed, please send me an email: maysittikraisorn@gmail.com

Thursday, June 3, 2010

I am from Venus, obviously.


I’ve been sick for past few days and that made me have to go to bed early. Last night, I didnt feel like I wanted to go to bed yet. So I was thinking, “Maybe reading would put me into sleep”. I picked 2 books; “Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus” and “Shopaholic: Tie the knot“. I didnt feel like reading a novel so I read that self-help psychology book instead. Surprisingly, I could not remember when the last time I read this book was, but I know for sure I have never finished reading this book =P I find this book more and more useful. Why haven’t I read it before? Though, I’ve finished reading 2 chapters so far, I gotta say wow, I’ve never realized that men and women are totally the opposite; understanding is what matters most in a relationship. It gets me thinking whether this is a part of reasons why all my past relationships failed [?] Was I being too much Venus girl? lol Anyway, this book should help me understand men a little bit more hopefully *fingers crossed* You would not believe that I bought this book since 26th of June, 2001 (Thai edition). It took me 9 years later to start reading it again lol Let’s see if I could finish reading it within this month =) I really hope so!

Specially Thanks to John Gray for writing this great book!

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